20 Rajab 1425

A list of things you must never do when you meet someone for the first time (in other words, what I learnt today)

1 - Do not squeeze the other guys hand too tightly. He might actually be a shame upon the name of maledom and have a hand as fluffy as cotton, also, he might wince, loudly.
2 - Do not smile too much, especially if you just had black coffee and you teeth are blackened.
3 - Do not lapse into an awkward silence after inquiring about each others names, professions and health. Try talking about the weather.
4 - Do not try to break those silences with jokes that none of your friends ever laughed at. Not because they dont get decent jokes, but because it is extremely boring.
5 - Do not try to actually say that that joke is lame. Never, ever do that. Ok.
6 - Do not ask them if they would like something. Just get some tea and put poison in yours so you do not have to see your family honour go to dust.
7 - Do not make fun of people who wear white socks before seeing what colour socks the guest is wearing.
8 - Do not tell the other person that you have to 'go do a thing', because it gives you away faster than you can say antidisestablishmentarian


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