08 Rabi ul Awwal 1425

Today I revelled in two time honoured treats of Pakistan. Government offices and Traffic Jams/Routh Elongations due to religious processions.

The government office was wonderful. There were lots of people in the counters beyond the glass. There were lots of extremely dirty, rickety and loud fans behind them. There were lots of people in lines on this side of the glass. There were lots of extremely dirty, rickety and loud fans above us. There were load and explosive altercations every 5 minutes between people from the opposite sides since the office employees wanted to get paid (euphemism for bribed) to do their jobs (note: the already get paid by the government). When I eventually reached the counter the guy took one whole hour to find the papers that I needed. He came back about twenty times to tell me that he can not find them and looked at me with meaningful eyes. I acted as if I was a moron and did not pay him a rupiah(rupee).

After that I decided to go back home. When I was about to start to relax in my car I realized the traffic is being re routed to somewhere else. After trying for half an hour to go to the three other obvious alternate routes which were in turn closed I got pissed of. This is where I turned into a small gali (side street) and kept going from gali to gali. I did not end up on the other side. I ended up where I started. On a road facing the procession and with no way across. After three hours of driving and trying to find a route I got home. And then I realized that I had forgotten the papers from the office back at the office.

At this moment I took out an old pillow and punched it till I was sore and even more tired. Then I took a bath and vowed to bite someone whenever I am emotionally distressed. And here I sit now.

So, do you want me to bite you?

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