hmmmm very bad mood. anger, depression and severe emotional distress. i just wrote a long post. then i deleted it. no need to be a drama queen.

so ill just get excited again. and laugh and cheer like i did in college. i was an idiot back then ;) i used to be the centre of everyones jokes in college. why? because i felt that people bonding over something ... even if it is making fun of me is nice. talk about being an idiotic buffoon. well i have realized that noone on this planet sacrifices any of their own things for anyone else. so that is what i am trying to make myself. inshallah with time i will succeed.

ghalib said that

maut ka aik din muaiyyin hay
neend kyun raat bhar naheen aati

the time of death is decided
why cant i sleep all night long

this shaer is playing in my mind again and again. why do we fear death so much when it is not in our hands.

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